Self-injury is defined as any deliberate behavior that causes physical harm but is not done with conscious suicidal intent that a person engages in to manage or decrease emotional distress. Self-injury is something that is often misunderstood, even by helping professionals. Because it evokes such strong feelings (fear, powerlessness, disgust) in others they may label the self-injurer negatively and shy away from providing needed help. For example, many who self-injure are labeled as “borderline” or “manipulative”. This is why increasing awareness is so important.
Deb Martinson has created a site, Secret Shame, full of a wealth of information about self-injury. She provides a comprehensive list of what self-injurers say this behavior does for them. In general, these reasons can be grouped into three categories:
Self-injury is certainly an issue for many trauma survivors. I understand self-injury as serving a function, as a coping strategy. I have worked with many clients who have actually talked about using self-injury as a way to take care of themselves; a way to manage unbearable emotions or even a means to prevent attempting suicide. While there may be common causes and principles involved, it is of course important to understand what it means and how it works for each individual.
People who self-injure may not have developed healthy ways to feel and express emotion or to tolerate distress. Another reason that it is so important that trauma therapy focus on the development of basic skills like identifying and managing emotions. I work with clients in my practice to develop a list of alternatives to self-injury, all the while acknowledging the substitutes may not (especially at first) work as effectively as self-injury did.
If this is an issue for you, please seek help from someone who understands the issue and who can work with you to develop alternatives. It is possible.